Inexplicable Fear.

A couple of weeks ago in a fit of misplaced enthusiasm I agreed to rent a table at a local Brocante. It’s being organised by a French friend of mine, and since I haven’t got very many of those I thought that the least I could do was support her, whatever it’s for. I forgot to ask.

And since I now have over thirty Hortensia cuttings, mainly due to the fact that I am incapable of throwing away any viable prunings, I thought that this would be an ideal opportunity to get rid of them and make a couple of bob. Easy Peasy.
I think they are all Red, or variations of, according to the soil. I’ve only got two Blue ones, and I wasn’t quite so obsessed when I last pruned those.

Plus, I have some odd and useless bits and pieces. I’m a hoarder as well. So I might change my mind about some of those.

And then the inevitable happened, as I began to think of multiple reasons for why I won’t be able to go.

Flu? Nope, I’ve done that twice recently, and there is a limit to how many times one can have Flu in the space of six months.
A Bad Knee? Dodgy. Someone might check on me.
Migraine? Not a good idea unless I don’t mind everyone thinking I’ve got a hangover, again.
Food Poisoning? Ditto for Migraine.

But why is she doing this, you are all asking yourselves?

Fear, plain and simple. Fear of standing there on my own. Fear of making a fool of myself. Fear of looking like a prat. Fear of not actually selling anything, and looking like a prat.

Quite ridiculous at my age. But there you go.

6 Responses to “Inexplicable Fear.”

  1. thelastfurlong Says:

    Aaah – sorry about the lack of excuses. I find it comforting to know that other people are so worried about being prats themselves, they don’t notice other prats! Do go – you can do a lovely post about what a prat you felt you were…;-D

  2. elenamitchell Says:

    I have to go, of course. This isn’t one I can get out of. I knew this the minute I started looking for excuses. And Marie will be pleased if no one else is.
    But I will have a good look around to see if there are any more prats. That’ll take my mind off me me me for a minute, so thanks for that.

    And of course, you will hear all about it.

  3. elenamitchell Says:

    Actually, I’m just a wimp. I had to check my tyres today for air and the thingy at the supermarche was broken, so I had to go to the local garage and ask them to do it for me. Jesus, you’d have thought I was taking on the might of the Russian Army. I had to give myself a serious talking to.
    Pull yourself together, woman. It’s only air.

  4. Dayna Says:

    The fear of a social fail or misstep is one that besets most people. It’s not making an ass of yourself, but how you deal with the consequences that will influence how most people think of you afterwards.
    I hope you had a great time. With no social blunders (real or perceived!) to worry over. 😊

  5. elenamitchell Says:

    It hasn’t happened yet, and will almost certainly be really okay when it does.
    It’s just me and this inexplicable fear before the event.
    I have always been like this. I just don’t understand why. I am actually quite a brave soul when push comes to shove.

    But thanks for telling me that I am not alone. It does help.

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